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Thursday, January 31, 2008

I'm back...

It's been several days since I've blogged... I just haven't felt like blogging. Losing Spot has been difficult and all the things over the last few days that I've thought about blogging just didn't seem to follow my previous blog about her. But I guess in many ways, you come to a point in time where you have to make the decision to move on or stay stuck in one place. And I guess today is the day.

In fact, it surprised me a bit, but I walked into Petsmart last night. Mostly out of a desire to look into the eyes of another cat and consider whether or not he or she could come home with me. I didn't stay for very long... not because I couldn't handle it... but because I was afraid I might just pick one out and I didn't want to do that without Jackie. But I didn't feel the way that I thought I would feel. Instead of feeling terribly sad and depressed, I felt optimistic and curious. I've only had 1 cat... Spot... and I began to think about what it would be like to meet and get to know the cats that I was petting through the cages... Erin and Zelda...

So we'll see...
But I have been encouraged over the last few days. I've had several people who have offered the same condolences... people who felt they needed to say something about it even if they didn't understand it or care about... and those people are pretty phony and easily recognizable. But I've had several good conversations with people who really did get it. I've shared some of my favorite Spot stories (the closet story... the policeman story... and several others) and I've felt good about it. So, to those of you who I have talked to over the last few days and you've got it, thanks. I appreciate your time and concern and your ability to listen.


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